Well if you are here I do hope you will take a moment to read through this. I may wind up being a bit lengthy, as there is a lot going on right now.
First off let me say I am not one who believes that 2017 was so terrible. Helly yes it had its bad times. But tell me what year doesn’t?
Some of us lost people we know and loved this year. But we are still here and hope is too so we are ahead of the game.
For some of us, it was a year of contrasts. And that is where I fall in.
2017 started out like most others. Hope, optimism, and a sense of renewal. Along the way, I lost touch with some people and reconnected with others.
I started a new job just after the halfway point in the year and thought, “This is great.” Little did I know what lay ahead for me.
The new job meant more money coming in and more opportunity to do things. But it was not all that I wanted.
My relationship with a special person ended. No that’s not right t didn’t end, it changed. After nearly two years we were no longer a couple. And yes, it hurt like hell. I was down. I mean I got really low.
BUT my friends, it did not end there. No instead it forced me to look harder at myself. To try to answer the questions, “What the hell is wrong with me?” and “Why does no one want me?”
Anyone who knows me well knows that when I get down I listen to a lot of music. This time was no different.
Some Metallica and Iron Maiden in the car to help release the anger I felt. Some Adell, yes I have eclectic tastes in music, for the sad times.
Hell, I found myself going back to Garth Brooks and gaining a new understanding of some of his stuff.
From, “The Dance” and remembering that there was a lot of good times and great memories to hang onto and cherish.
To “Standing Outside the Fire” and the reminder that life can be rough, but the fighters will keep going and not just stand outside the fire, but jump in and risk it all.
To “When You Come Back to Me Again” reminding me that while this ship is lost and being tossed about there is a lighthouse glowing to find my way back to safe harbor.
But it was the song, “The River” that most inspired me and is the reason for the title of this blog post. “There’s bound to be rough waters. And I know I’ll take some falls. But with the good Lord as my captain. I can make it through them all…” A good lesson.
In the midst of this, I found myself watching the movie “Rocky Balboa.” I know trust me I know, it was just on okay. But the scene I will always remember is of him and his son standing on the corner. And Rocky telling him like it is, “Let me tell you something you already know. The world ain’t all sunshine and rainbows. It’s a very mean and nasty place and I don’t care how tough you are it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain’t about how hard ya hit. It’s about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward. That’s how winning is done!”
Hmm, who would have imagined that a Rocky movie would tell me exactly what I needed to hear at that moment, That lesson that it was time to get up off the floor and drive forward. Life was still there and there will surely be more hits coming my way. But the choice to stay down or get up is always mine. And as a Dad, I have an example to set, so I rise. As a man, I have an example to set, so I rise. I’ll take the hits because the alternative sucks and I can allow myself to do it.
“So I will sail my vessel ’til the river runs dry.”
Just keep sailing. The bad days happen, but so do the good ones.
And if that person I spoke of earlier reads this I want you to know, I love you, my friend. Just differently and as your friend. There were a lot of good times for us and I hold those memories as cherished. I thank you for the support and the lessons learned.
And since I did a lot of quoting here, I close with this, “How Do Like Me Now?”